Aries Man and Libra Woman Compatibility
I won’t open unless you speak!” Peter cried.
Then at last the visitor spoke, in a lovely, bell-like voice.
“Let me in, Peter.”
It was Tink, and quickly he unbarred to her.
It usually isn’t difficult for the Libra girl to persuade the Ram to unbar his door or his heart to her. He’s putty in her lovely, dimpled hands – and Rams, as you know, are normally putty in no one’s hands. Aries men are not made of Silly Putty. They are made of iron and steel (the metals associated with the Aries Sun Sign). But with the Libra lady, he’ll melt like a snowman in July. He can’t resist her charm, the way she praises all the wonderful qualities he’s perfectly aware he possesses himself, but which others are (it seems to him) forever ignoring – the undeniable sexual chemistry between them, and her womanly sweetness. (This is in the beginning. Later, he will experience a few surprises regarding her “womanly sweetness.”) Besides, she’s probably quite beautiful (most Libra females are), with a smile like carob cupcakes, and every Aries man adores having a girlfriend or a wife who causes other men to envy him. He needs to be proud of the woman he loves, to be able to show her off and brag about her. He wants her to always look prettier and be smarter than other women so it will be obvious that he’s won first prize in the love carnival. (Rams, you see, have this inbred thing about winning.)
Since she probably is superior to lots of other women, super bright and startlingly attractive, curvaceous and so forth, this woman will fit all his Mars requirements, and at the start of their affair, everything will be peaches and cream and buttery softness between them.
But the Libra woman in love with an Aries man may later find herself knocked out of balance frequently. Considering her nearly neurotic reaction to being forced into instant action before she’s completely sure what she wants to do, having an impatient lover or husband shout, “Come on, what’s it going to be – pineapple sherbet or deep-dish apple pie a la mode? The waiter is growing a beard waiting for you to decide” – could cause their relationship to suffer some rocky periods. This man wants things done now, immediately – even sooner if at all possible – even though his demands for whatever it is he wants are often given at the last minute. “Do you want me to do it today, darling,” she’ll ask, “or may I do it tomorrow?” (Whether it’s taking his favorite red sweater to the cleaners or typing up his address book so he’ll have an extra copy
if he loses it. He’s always losing things.) “Today,” he’ll tell her. “I want it done today.” (If he’d wanted it done tomorrow, he’d have asked her tomorrow.) Actually, most Rams would like anything they “request” to be done yesterday.
This sort of irrational and impatient Mars-like reasoning can throw her delicate Venus psyche out of kilter. She could ask, “Isn’t it more intelligent to plan ahead and try to do it tomorrow?” only to hear him shout at her, “Don’t argue with me! Just do as I say – please.” If he has a softer Moon Sign or Ascendent, he’ll add the “Please” – if not, he’ll just toss out his orders cheerfully, thoughtlessly demanding, without the slightest idea he’s being unreasonable and somewhat spoiled.
I know one Libra wife who gave her Aries husband a birthday gift she made herself. A wall hanging created in velvets and satins, with variations of the Mars fire-engine red tones, embroidered with the words: “Dear Lord, give me the gift of patience – but hurry.” He was delighted. That’s one of the nice things about the typical Arian. He’s able to laugh at himself and seldom gets all stuffy when his faults are pointed out (gently, not harshly or with a severe, critical attitude). But they do have to be pointed out now and then. Once a Ram recognizes how selfish he’s being, he’ll feel guilty and ashamed, say he’s sorry, and promise not to do it again, after which he’ll proceed to do it again – and again – and again. Apologies are not difficult for the average Mars-ruled male to handle. It’s one of the most lovable things about him. Aries is quick to admit a fault and accept the blame, but not too quick to drop the bad habit that was apologized for so openly and generously. Still, it’s a decided virtue to be able to admit one’s mistakes and try again. He does try. He doesn’t always succeed, but the good Lord knows he tries.
She apologizes sweetly too. Like Aries, Libra seldom shrinks from admitting mistakes and being willing to say she’s sorry. In fact, she may be too ready to admit mistakes – or perhaps the better way to express it is that she may be too ready and willing to decide that what she decided (or did) might have been wrong. She’ll worry if she’s hurt his feelings by something she’s said or done, and try to gracefully atone in some way. She’ll be doing a lot of that with this man. Atoning, that is – apologizing and atoning for hurting his feelings, because this man is ultrasensitive. He wants everyone to like him, even to love him – family, friends, and strangers – and naturally the woman he owns. (That’s more or less the way he thinks of her – owning her, like a special, exciting, precious, and long-awaited, long-prayed-for gift he found under his tree on Christmas morning.) Aries men can be extremely self-centered without meaning to be so. She’ll gradually comprehend this, but before she does, her more tender Venus feelings will be bruised more than a few times.
She’ll try all her powers of Libra logic and persuasion to make him see that not every single person in the world can love him. But it will make little impression on her Ram. He won’t be able to understand why he isn’t liked and admired by his worst enemies, never mind what he’s said or done to anger them. They should understand that he was right, after all – and that he meant no harm. He was only defending himself from something negative they did to him. Why aren’t they friendlier? Why don’t they see he’s sorry for his hasty words and has already forgotten his anger? The Ram will expect people to forget an injury as swiftly as he does. He’s always deeply wounded when people pout or bear a grudge over something he considers past and forgotten.
His enemies today are his buddies tomorrow. He’ll rush home furious with someone, and expect his Libra lady to share his fury toward the person who’s offended him. If she refuses to do so, if she fairly tries to see the other person’s side of the issue, and attempts to point out to her Aries lover or husband where he just might have been wrong, he’ll turn on her, sometimes violently, sometimes even tearfully – and accuse her of disloyalty. She doesn’t love him. If she loved him, she would be on his side – and not defend his enemies. He’s not interested in her Libra fairness. The only fair point of view is his and if she really cared about him she’d see that.
While the Ram is angry, it’s impossible for him to see any side but his own, and he definitely will expect the woman he loves to champion him fiercely and consistently. The next day, he may feel quite “sheepish” about the whole thing, and be a perfect “lamb” about confessing his rashness and making amends for his goof. Then, you see, it’s all right for her to say he’s been wrong – because he has realized it himself. But not before he’s realized it on his own. Never before. Naturally, a Venus-ruled female is more capable than most women of balancing the delicate situation of the quick tempers and even quicker reconciliations of the Ram she loves. She’s tender, womanly, logical, and intelligent and wise. But she was born under a masculine sign, and she can balk once in a while herself when she feels he’s being completely unfair. It probably won’t change him, however. He’ll either pout or storm angrily out the door (slamming it hard as he leaves), or sulk in the corner, convinced she hates him.
It wouldn’t be wise for the Libra woman to display her “iron fist in its velvet glove” too often with this male. He senses when he’s being manipulated, after a period of time. He may innocently accept it for a while (Aries possesses almost no guile, and is nearly never unduly suspicious), but once he’s caught on that she’s trying to mold him into any sort of pattern of behavior, he’ll become either obstinate or outraged – or both. No one tells him what to do. He is his own boss. Even when he earnestly desires to take a certain course of action, he’s likely to refuse to do it if he thinks she wants him to, not because he’s suspicious of her motives, but because he has a horror of doing anything someone else suggests – especially anything someone else openly directs him to do.
The fact that she likes to argue (discuss, debate, or whatever) every minor and major decision or situation won’t alienate the typical Aries man. He sees this as controversy, challenge, excitement! He’d be bored to tears with a woman who never fought back with him. His Mars nature is exhilarated by the promise of battle, whether it’s only a mild personal verbal battle over which film to see – or what kind of car to buy – or an argument concerning public or more general topics, like what should be done about pornography, solar heating, nuclear power, corruption in politics, or any other burning issues of the day. But he’ll like to win all these discussions. He won’t give in, not an inch – until he does win (or until his clever Libra lady allows him to believe he’s won). Then he feels proud, self-contented, and happy. And he’ll treat her with all the loving affection and tenderness any woman could desire.
This man’s sexual image of himself is closely woven into his ability to be always right and emerge victorious in the eyes of the woman he loves. He must be respected, liked, agreed with, and looked up to in order to properly project his considerable Mars virility as a lover. If he feels rejected intellectually or in any other way, he’ll freeze into Aries ice (always more serious and lasting than Aries fire – or fiery rages). Their sexual relationship will normally be an uncommonly happy and wholesome one. Her femininity and his masculinity harmonize beautifully and smoothly, in the most natural way. As long as she doesn’t allow the masculine side of her Sun Sign essence to intrude into their intimacy (like displaying her capabilities in every area under the Sun to be equal to his, which they quite probably are) and then expect him to feel like the conquering male in a physical sense. He must take the lead in their sexual togetherness, as in every other way. If she allows this, and understands the needs behind it, he’ll be the most sensitive, romantic, sentimental, affectionate, and passionate lover she could imagine. But he can become a demanding tyrant if she destroys his ultranecessary confidence in himself.
There’s little chance of this occurring, unless she has the Moon or Ascendent in Virgo, Sagittarius, Cancer, or Capricorn – or a lot of planets in Earth Signs in her birth chart. Her basic instinct is tact and thoughtfulness, which is usually blended nicely and equally with her own well-designed and controlled, forceful drive and aggressive nature.
Although their natures constitute a clear polarity, the Mars-ruled man and the Venus-ruled woman are exquisitely mated. After all, Mars and Venus themselves fell wildly and permanently in love – even while Venus was wed to Jupiter. They were caught, of course, in a web woven sneakily by Neptune – but the anger of Jupiter didn’t dim their passion by any means. A study of Greek mythology is of immense benefit in comprehending all Sun Signs
Taking into consideration that the Ram likes to leap around on rocky slopes and the Venus lady lives in a precarious world of the swinging trays of her golden Scales, wherein the slightest breath of wind can upset her inner harmony and outward tranquility, these two often manage to blend their divergent natures with surprising success. The Libra woman can find the intoxicating freedom and exciting mental activity she seeks through this man – and the Ram will enjoy walking through Libra’s cool woods, down winding trails of bluebells and butterflies.
The Libra lady is quite a lot of woman. Very few men can cope with her powerful combination of masculine determination and delectable daintiness. But the Aries man is one for taking on super challenges and winning them – and her challenge offers precious rewards to the victor. All men are little boys at heart, but the Ram is more so than most. There’s nothing childish about him on the surface. He’s tough and forceful – the kind of male they call a man’s man. It’s the aura of impossible dreams and wistful yearnings hovering mistily around his shoulders that gives him his air of youthfulness some lingering enchantment behind his eyes that makes him so vulnerable. If she uses her Venusian charm and patience to direct his flaming ambitions and incredible energies toward some worthy goal, he can become a crusader for all manner of goodness and glory. (Both of them possess a strong sense of mercy for the weak and can become outraged over injustice.)
She’ll seldom or never drown his enthusiastic spontaneity with stern criticism, sarcasm, silent pouting, long brooding silences, or withdrawal – and that will please him. He’ll seldom or never refuse to be genuinely interested in and fascinated by her need to talk things over and discuss them – and that will comfort her.
The root cause of any difficulties between them will spring from their shared birthright of the Cardinal essence. For they are both Cardinal Signs of Leadership, Aries and Libra. A relationship will never work when there’s a constant battle over which one is the chief, and which one is the Indian – or which one is the general and which one is the private – who gallops ahead and who canters behind. They’ll have to learn to ride their horses side by side, as equals, not as superior and subordinate. It’s the only way they’ll ever find the way back home into each others’ hearts when they’ve quarreled and both of them have been deeply hurt. Otherwise, they’ll get lost like Hansel and Gretel, and you know how glad they were to return home together, after all their adventures were over. The only real security anyone has is the safety of being loved by someone who accepts you just as you are, with all your flaws, and wouldn’t trade you for another – ever. Someone who makes you know this, even when you’re
behaving badly. That’s safety. That’s emotional security. That’s homewhere love is.