Aries Woman and Capricorn Man Compatibility
“Now,” said he, “shall I give you a kiss?” She made
herself rather cheap by inclining her face toward him, but
he merely dropped an acorn button into her hand; so she
slowly returned her face to where it had been before, and
said nicely that she would wear his kiss on the chain round her neck.
The unmistakable air of loneliness that hangs over a Capricorn man, even in a roomful of people, draws the Aries girl straight to his side. To the sentimental, egocentric female Ram, the reason for his loneliness is obvious. He’s been waiting for her – to show him how beautiful life can be. So she directly proceeds to show him. Aries never beats around the bush.
Her initial enthusiasm, however, may soon be stifled by the Capricorn man’s slow responses – his earthy immunity to her fiery Mars charisma, and her impulsive emotions may finally lead her to decide he’s too stuffy, aloof, distant. How can she help him find the sunlight when he’s so drearily attached to his career, not to mention his family – including his great-aunts and kissing cousins, as well as his saintly parents? There’s little hope he’ll ever sweep her off her feet and marry her when he’s already so permanently wedded to his job, his ambition and/or his relatives.
It could be the end of a promising relationship that might have been deeply satisfying, as well as financially successful. Why should she waste her time trying to break through his loneliness to show him that life is beautiful, when he obviously enjoys his isolation? He wouldn’t recognize beauty if it knocked him over. She’s wrong.
Capricorns do appreciate beauty. But he’ll never tell her about those pictures he painted in school when the teacher wasn’t looking, or the music he used to drown himself in when no one was listening, before he buckled down to the serious problems of carving out his security in a mad world unless he thinks she really cares.
It can hurt to lose someone you love because you’re unable to communicate your feelings, and this is too often the case between the quiet boy Goat and the aggressive girl Ram. How can he let her know about all those secret dreams he wants to give her – how can he show her the lifelong romanticism hidden deep within his shy, funny Goat’s heart? Well, he should look at it this way: if she can’t see more virtue in the exceptional than in the exciting, she’s not the right girl for him. Or he might memorize Elizabeth Barrett Browning’s sonnet that begins, “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways ,” and practice, practice, practice. Lovers down through the ages have learned they can say things to each other in verse, that were buried inside their souls, just waiting to be discovered, so they could be revealed to one special person.
So, you see, the Mars-directed instinct of the Aries girl might have been right. He really was waiting for her to come along, and show him how to paint rainbows. It’s just that her initial approach might have been overwhelming for the more introverted Goat. Capricorns have difficulty coping with reckless action and abandon, even in the name of love. It takes this man a certain length of time to make sure he has a firm grip on the reality of a romance, and even then, he proceeds with caution. This way, he’s sure not to slip and fall, or make any mistakes he’ll regret at some future date. With Aries, it’s “fly now – pay later.” With Capricorn, it’s “pay now – and fly later, with a clear conscience.”
Assuming Capricorn and Aries do reach across the chasm of their differences, and hang on to each other’s hands and hearts, the disparities between their outlooks on life must still be either overcome or over-looked. He’ll try to over-look them. She’ll try to overcome them. Even in tackling the problems of their differences, they’re different. It lies in their divergent approaches to a situation. Here are a couple of examples.
The situation: He has just hurt his knee, and the doctor has told him he shouldn’t aggravate the injury by walking on it for at least three weeks. (Capricorns are always banging their kneecaps, visiting the dentist, breaking bones or suffering a touch of arthritis. Otherwise, their health is great.) The knee injury spoils the skiing trip they’d planned in the mountains.
ARIES: “I’m sorry you can’t come with me, darling. But I’m sure you won’t mind if I go along with the others and try to enjoy myself anyway.”
CAPRICORN: “Do you know what you are? You’re selfish.”
ARIES: “Do you expect me to sit here and hold your hand, when I’ve been looking forward to this weekend all year? Couldn’t you make an effort and come along, even if you don’t ski?”
CAPRICORN: “No, I do not wish to come along in my crippled state, and yes, I do expect you, if you love me, to stay here and hold my hand.”
ARIES: “DO you know what you are? You’re selfish.”
(Actually, they’re both right. They’re both selfish.)
Another situation: (If the first one hasn’t already scared them off.) She’s temporarily broke, so he lends her the money to have her car overhauled, and to make her rent payment. She has no qualms whatever about asking him. After all, they’re in love. It both impresses and touches her that he’s so sweet about giving her the cash without any coaxing or quibbling. Several months pass, and she still hasn’t repaid the loan. She’s forgotten all about it, you see. So he gently reminds her, but she thinks he’s only teasing. Meanwhile, she’s showered him with an expensive color TV set and a pure silk kimono for Christmas – plus a solid gold wristwatch and a St. Bernard puppy for his birthday – all on her credit cards. He’s sincerely moved, and grateful for her gesture, but not so grateful that he forgets to mail her an informal written statement, listing the two hundred dollars he loaned her (with some Capricorns this could conceivably also include a few extra dollars in accrued interest) and love flies out the window in a burst of Mars fireworks.
ARIES: How dare he put our intimacy on a vulgar, financial basis?
CAPRICORN: How dare she violate our intimacy by refusing to respect an obligation between us?
And so it goes – bumpety, bumpety, crackle and pop.
On the physical side of love between them, the same kind of hurdles must be overcome before they find sexual satisfaction. When the Ram mates with the Goat, it’s a blending of Fire and Earth, and these are not normally the most compatible of elements. His sex impulses are controlled by Saturn, the planet of solid resistance, self-discipline and permanence. Hers are directed by Mars, the planet symbolizing the masculine principle of flaming penetration. Capricorn would rather remain lonely and starved for love than risk being burned by a temporary passion. Aries would rather risk being scorched than not even try. So she’s usually the one to initiate the sexual advances. Assuming the stars are favorable, and she catches him when he’s too weak to resist, the Capricorn man will respond to her fresh, enthusiastic expressions of love with the kind of profound intensity only the Saturn-ruled can understand – and a depth of affection that will surprise her as much as it will delight her.
If these two miraculously manage to get together, it’s probably because he has the Moon in Aries, Sagittarius, Leo, Gemini or Aquarius – or because she has the Moon in Capricorn, Taurus, Virgo, Pisces or Scorpio. Then the differences between them (and there are undeniable differences) will tend to attract instead of repel. In other words, rather than become annoyed by his caution, stability and composure, she’ll respect him for these qualities she lacks, and try to imitate them. Rather than become uptight over her forceful drive, he’ll envy and admire it, and loosen up his laces a little himself. With a harmonious SunMoon relationship in their mutual charts, love between Aries and Capricorn can grow into a deep, and lasting, devotion – sexually and otherwise.
However, with a square or opposition between their natal Sun and Moon signs, the Goat and the Ram will either lock horns in constant battle, or become so bored with each other that they wander off someday and forget to return. Whatever their planetary positions, there’s always the chance that his distrustful reserve in the beginning will petrify her natural romantic buoyancy, and they’ll never get beyond holding hands at the movies – or making magical promises with their eyes which they never keep.
The Goat and the Ram are not immune to the common mistake of all 4-10 Sun Sign Pattern lovers, who see the world through different-colored glasses. They fall in love, then try to change the very qualities they first loved in each other. When he first decides he loves her, he’s impressed by her optimistic, bubbly conversation. Even her recklessness intrigues him into feeling an unaccustomed, grudging admiration. He smiles at her extravagances, and chuckles indulgently at her mistakes. Then, perversely, he tries to mold her trusting, hopeful personality into a more conventional and acceptable form. But she will not be molded.
When she first decides she loves him, she’s enormously impressed with his strong, silent aura of strength. It both mystifies and excites her. His patience and mildness are soothing to her tangled emotions, and her heart beats faster, just imagining what it would be like to share an intimate, day-to-day relationship with this gentle, quietly humorous, wise and steady man. Then she begins to feel stifled by it all, so she tries to coax him into tossing caution over his shoulder. She beckons to him to come and chase clouds with her, to run through sweet-smelling clover fields in a summer rain – only to find he’s brought along his umbrella again.
The Capricorn man can’t understand why the Aries girl has such fun riding on an endless merry-go-round. It only makes him dizzy. But she likes the calliope music and the way the wind blows her hair. She will wonder why he keeps his heart locked up so tight. He’ll tell her it’s just to be safe. But there’s nothing in a heart to steal. Only things to give.
When this man and woman drift away from each other, the strain of the music they once heard together may haunt them, reminding them that perhaps they didn’t try quite hard enough. He may not reveal outwardly the pain he feels over losing her, but still waters run deep, and Earth sorrow runs even deeper. She will weep inconsolably for many a day, following her own fiery emotional pattern, but by and by she’ll forget, though she may watch the sunrise wistfully for years afterward. She won’t tell him how she’s hurting inside – why should she? He’s so cold and detached, and barely even says hello when they pass on the street like that time at the corner, when the city traffic was so heavy and noisy, they could only wave to each other. He didn’t even smile. But what she doesn’t know is that somewhere, deep within his lonely heart, he may be thinking things she suspects, like, maybe such words as
How old am I? I’ll be 92 next Christmas
though I won’t admit to one day over 20 …
even after all the birthday cards are cut and shuffled
it’s hard to figure
I’ve aged at least 500 years since I stumbled into you;
yet I still believe in faerie tales
like the Princess and the Frog
and I still believe you wanted me …
perhaps I’m only three or so?
you’ll never know … how old I am
but I’ll tell you anyway
I was born the hour I met you … and died today. *
She doesn’t hear the words his heart speaks to her silently, of course. She’s thinking her own thoughts, remembering the thing he said to her, one dawn, as they were walking along the shore, by the ocean…. when he held her in his arms, and said quietly “and here you’ll stay, until it’s time for you to go.” Then she asked him, “When will that time be? ” But he didn’t answer. So she never asked again. Aries is proud.
Remember the message of the stars. Those lovers who are victorious over the heavy soul-testing of the 4-10 vibrational influence, are blessed by Venus. And perhaps it does take the gentle planet Venus to soften two hearts ruled by the masculine planets, Mars and Saturn. Venus .. . and music .. . poetry .. . and memories .. .
The tensions and troubles, the misunderstandings and lack of communication this man and woman must face – are formidable. But their rewards for being patient with each other, and waiting for the heart’s wisdom to guide them – are forever-after. Now she wishes she had stayed home and held his hand that time when he hurt his knee. How could she have been so selfish? Now he thinks maybe he should have offered to go with her, just to watch her ski down a snowy hill, knowing she was his. How could he have been so selfish?
Foresight is much better than hindsight. But it still might not be too late to say “I’m sorry.” It’s never too late for those who really love. And even when the Ram and the Goat who once cared for each other are apart wherever they are Venus is winking down at both of them, shining the message of her light on their loneliness, with a sparkling promise of maybe a new tomorrow.
* From Venus Trines at Midnight by Linda Goodman.