Aries Woman and Libra Man Compatibility
“Wendy,” he continued, in a voice no woman has ever been
able to resist. . “Wendy, one girl is worth twenty boys.”
“I think it’s perfectly sweet of you,” she declared. She also
said she would give him a kiss if he liked.
As I’ve mentioned elsewhere in this chapter, Libra and Aries are opposite each other in the karmic wheel of Life. The astrological rule is that you’re strongly attracted to the opposite sex of your opposite Sun Sign, but normally don’t get along too well with the same sex of that sign. It would seem then, that the Aries woman and Libra man would be natural lovers, destined to live happily ever after.
Natural lovers they are, because the chemistry is right. Destined to live happily ever after they may not be, unless there’s a harmonious Sun-Moon relationship between them, in which case they could remain sweethearts for a lifetime, the choice being up to them. Otherwise, with a discordant Sun-Moon aspect in their mutual charts, it could be touch and go. They may touch – tenderly – but it won’t be long until they go – in opposite directions – putting them right back where they started: opposed.
It’s a waste of time for astrologers to keep mentioning the Libra man’s fatal charm for women. He’s been practicing it, with instant success, since he was thirteen (or younger), and his reaction to flattery is simply to flash that dimpled, Libra smile and murmur, “Tell me all about it, honey.” All right, so he’s aware of the blessings of his Venus birthright. He may not be as aware that all that charm can be a curse when he’s mixed up with an Aries female. (No one ever gets involved with an Aries – they get mixed up.)
The long line of women who cue up behind him everywhere he goes will turn an Aries girl who’s been a gentle lamb into a Dragon Lady, with fire flaming from her ears. Mars jealousy is often irrational, and it does cramp his Venus style. Still, before he decides to leave her because she’s spoiling all his fun, the Libra man might meditate on the word “love.” The longer it’s stored up inside and allowed to increase in depth, the more powerful and satisfying an emotion it can be. (Read The French Lieutenant’s Woman for proof.) When love is restrained, then given fully at a special moment, with a very special person, it can bring spriritual peace, along with physical ecstasy. Falling in love with love, and getting married for the sake of marriage, are common Libra mistakes. She can be lovely and desirable, but if she’s not bright enough to argue with him and challenge him, his fine Libra mind will get rusty. There’s no chance of that with an Aries girl. She’ll provide him with all the arguments he could possibly use – and enough mental challenges to last for several lifetimes.
When the Libra man gets restless and wants to roam – alone and free – where he can once more accept the favors of a harem of females, the Aries woman probably won’t ask him shyly why he’s leaving. She’s more likely to shout, “Where do you think you’re going, Charlie?” He’ll tell her he’s off to find another seashell, because the shore is full of them. She might remind him then, that seashells are empty. Instead of throwing an emotional tantrum (which may frighten him into splitting so fast he forgets to take along his classical tape cassettes and his favorite baby-blue angora bathrobe), she’d stand a better chance of winning (which is what all Rams want to do all the time) if she curbs her Mars temper and uses his own Libra logic as a weapon. Which is only fair, since he’s always using it against her.
“Look, darling, Life is more than one long party of wine, women, and song. While you’re getting high on a steady flow of casual affairs, remember that after you pour all the wine out of a flask, you have left only an empty bottle. Then the party’s over. Of course, you can always fill it up again from your inexhaustible source, can’t you sweetheart? Or is your capacity to love really inexhaustible? Why don’t you turn some of those romantic urges you express so well (this works better if she’s wearing his baby-blue bathrobe – especially this next part) into other creative channels, like art, music, writing, or acting? I could help you. I have a brain equally as brilliant as yours – even though our bodies are made differently – because you’re a man and I’m a woman.”
The last reminder is a necessity. When a Libra male is led into thinking about the differences between the sexes, he’s more or less helpless. Not that the typical Aries woman will have the patience to accept the foregoing advice. She’s more likely to yell at him to “Leave! Who needs you anyway!” – push him out the door – slam it – lock it – toss his tapes and bathrobe out the window – and then sit up all night crying in frustrated anger and regret. But I thought I’d throw it in anyway, for those Aries girls who think they are emotionally mature enough to cool it with this man. It’s really the only way with Libra. Fairness, logic, and reason. No skyrockets. They disturb his sense of harmony and topple his equilibrium, which is always dangerously seesawing at best. Besides, if you read the section just before this, you’ll recall that Air Signs can be goaded into tornado behavior that could make even a Ram run for shelter.
There are so many good things about this blend of Air and Fire between Aries and Libra, it’s a shame for them to spend their time bickering. The typical Aries woman isn’t looking for a muscle man. She wants a lover whose mental muscles have biceps. The Libra man’s mind does. He’ll stimulate and challenge her mentally and emotionally. All she needs to do is choose a subject, and he’ll have a thousand and one things to say about it, pro and con. Since just a touch of controversy intrigues her, she’ll honestly enjoy the debates they have, as long as they both play by the rules and refrain from punching each other in their complexes or tramping on one another’s delicate and sensitive Achilles’ heels. He’ll find this an easier counsel to accept than she will. Tact and courtesy come naturally to Libra, but such consideration for the other person comes hard to Aries.
This woman isn’t basically selfish – she’s thoughtless. She truly never means to be rude or unkind, and certainly not toward the man she loves. She simply doesn’t think or count to ten before she speaks her mind. And her mind can be quite opinionated. Don’t forget that Aries is the Sun Sign of the benevolent dictator, regarding both sexes. Benevolent dictators are genuinely concerned about people, compassionate, generous, and devoted to the cause of everyone’s welfare. But they don’t bother to ask the people they’re so loyally championing what it is they might want. Never mind. Like the benevolent dictator, no matter what the people want, Aries will see that they get it – because Aries knows what’s best for them better than they do. Warmth and arrogance make a frustrating blend, but all Fire Signs possess the combination, making their friends, relatives, and lovers love them and want to strangle them by turns.
When someone points out to a girl Ram that she’s being unreasonable and impulsive – and the pointing out is done with tact, gentleness, and affection, she’ll never fail to listen, quickly see the error of her ways (she does everything quickly), and try hard to please by making sweeping changes in her original views. But when she’s ordered or forced to halt along some mistaken course she’s chosen, there’s no way she’ll give in. That’s too much like retreat and Aries never, but positively never, retreats. Mars, the planet of war itself – retreat? It will never happen. Since Mars is her ruler and influences all her motivations, strategy, and behavior, you really can’t expect this lady to accept dominance or harsh criticism in a docile manner. If anyone can turn the female Ram into a gentle lamb (besides Leo – and sometimes Gemini, Sag, and Aquarius), it’s a Libra man. He’ll gently correct her, try to make her see her mistakes in an affectionate and tender way. And nine times out of ten it will work like a charm. The tenth time he should leave well enough alone and consider himself fortunate. You can’t win them all. The trouble is that Libra would like to win them all – every debate, discussion, argument, dispute, and disagreement. So would Aries. So unless one of them accepts defeat graciously at least part of the time, there’s never going to be peace in this relationship – and peace is what the Libra man needs as desperately as the Aries woman he loves needs excitement.
She would profit by trying to give him the peace he needs, because some of it would then drape its soft clouds over her too, softening her disappointments and calming her fears of rejection. He’ll likewise profit by trying to give her the excitement she needs, because it will shake him from his spells of Libra lethargy and keep his Scales swinging in balance, instead of dipping one way or the other and getting stuck there.
The Libra man’s unconquerable optimism (when his Scales aren’t in a down-swing mood of fretting futilely) will strike a spontaneous chord of response in the Aries woman’s heart, for it matches her own bright faith in tomorrow. Her naive confidence that whatever she believes intensely enough and long enough just has to come true will strike the same kind of response in him, often moving him to tears (for he is sentimental). She’ll like that in him, the sentiment. That’s why she fell in love with him, because he’s the combination of strength and tenderness she seeks.
But she’ll become impatient and accuse him of being lazy, when he’s in one of his restful periods, not comprehending the necessity for his Venus-ruled nature to rest between long spells of energetic activity. Her own nature is different, her metabolism is so charged with vitality, she scarcely needs any rest at all – or so it will sometimes seem to him.
His kindness and friendliness are the two qualities she loves most in him. The very same two qualities he loves most in her. They are both kind, both friendly. In a world full of people who are cool, detached, and disinterested, this is not a small thing – and it forms an amazingly strong foundation for their relationship.
Being a 7-7 Sun Sign Pattern, very few of the disputes between the Libra man and Aries woman will happen on the way to or from the bedroom. (Especially if she buys him a king-size water mattress.) To a Libra male, drifting off to romance or dreamland within the soft folds of one of those undulating, billowy contraptions is very close to his idea of heaven. They may fight in the kitchen, the den, the front room, the back porch, the garden, the basement, attic, or garage – but when it’s time to kiss goodnight, it will be time to make up for these two. The reconciliation based on the undeniable sexual attraction between them may not, however, last eternally (without that Sun-Moon harmony assistance). He’s gentle, poetic, imaginative, considerate, charming, and romantic, all of which sends little tingles and shivers down her spine, from the top of her hard head to the tips of her busy toes. Their physical relationship at first seems like the tangible expression of every love song she’s ever dreamed over while she was waiting for the paragon of virtue she’s imaged in her heart to come to life.
That’s the trouble. Making this man come to life. The Libra approach to sex is mental, light, and airy. Libra men seek shimmering ideals and far-out experiences of erotic expression and sensual feeling, sometimes so far out, sometimes soaring so high above her head – she’ll long for something solid to grab. Like two warm arms and a burning passion you can touch, as well as dream about. Ethereal love and aesthetic sexual response can leave Aries somewhat chilly. Female Rams need plenty of warm affection and fiery lovemaking to feel completely fulfilled in a physical relationship. With this man she may be left feeling a little empty. Something is missing. Exactly what she can’t say, maybe the last line of the song. If she has the Moon in Libra, Gemini, Aquarius, Sagittarius, or Leo – or if his Moon Sign is Aries, Sagittarius, Leo, Gemini, or Aquarius – the missing lyric may be found. If the Moon of either was in any other astrological sign at birth, it may be elusive. But the search for it will be delightful.
A Libra man who memorized the old nursery rhyme in school that went: “Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater – had a wife and couldn’t keep her – put her in a pumpkin shell, and there he kept her very well,” had better check with Mother Goose again. An Aries woman will not sit happily in a pumpkin shell while he glides gracefully around the town, charming all the girls – or while he hides in the library, polishing his Libra mind. With her, he shouldn’t expect marriage to balance his Scales – unless it’s a complete mental and emotional partnership. Still, if he’s honest, he’ll realize that’s the kind of relationship he really needs himself. When all the parties are over.